What big news do you want to hear Donnie announce Thursday?

[struggle4progress]

19 votes, 0 passes | Time left: Unlimited
	The Secret Service is providing free battle-hammers, bazookas, and sticks of dynamite to White House visitors
	0 (0%)
	Robbie is advising the doctors that only an ice-pick lobotomy can save Donnie from the harm of vaccines
	1 (5%)
	Polls say most Americans will like him better after he commits suicide
	0 (0%)
	He has a slow painful disfiguring incurable fatal disease
	5 (26%)
	Naval intelligence reports he's a Venezuelan fsherman
	0 (0%)
	ICE informants say he wasn't actually born in the US
	2 (11%)
	AI tools agree he's an Iranian school-girl
	0 (0%)
	He's signing up for Elon's Venus colony
	0 (0%)
	He's died and and is halfway to hell
	11 (58%)
	Agitate educate organize
	0 (0%)
	0 DU members did not wish to select any of the options provided.
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[GreenWave]

1. The early vote is on!

[Tim S]

2. Too easy. I would have added: Found Allah & is donating all his wealth to Gaza Relief

[Vogon_Glory]

3. I have had a talk with, like a very big guy, a very important guy

God Almighty. He and I talked over things, like very important things, and He told me to save the dignity of the Presidency and resign.

And like since He’s a very big guy, I’m going to do what he says.

—-

(Yeah, yeah, I know, unlikely in the extreme, but Hey, a guy can dream, can’t he?)

[LeftInTX]

4. This! A girl can dream

[hunter]

5. He'll shed his human skin to reveal himself as a space alien...

... and announce that his people are here to conquer the planet.