General Discussion

Quiet Em

(3,017 posts)

24. If both parents are active and not absentee in their children's lives

Tue May 12, 2026, 01:22 AM

May 12

then they are co-parents, not single parents.

Serving in the military, being deported, or being incarcerated does not prevent one from being involved in the lives of their children. Perhaps it could do so financially, but not emotionally.

Absentee means completely absent. Not present at all. Not involved at all. Not a part of.

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Stop saying "single mothers" [View all] CousinIT May 11 OP

Excellent point. 3catwoman3 May 11 #1

Single moms are single for all sorts of reasons, and just because she's a "single mom" doesn't mean the dad isn't in the WhiskeyGrinder May 11 #2

Message auto-removed Name removed May 11 #4

pointing out sexism doesn't mean you "hate men" Skittles May 11 #6

Message auto-removed Name removed May 11 #10

LOL Skittles May 11 #11

Post removed Post removed May 12 #13

Fox News, Newsmax, et al, will never be able to teach them subtlety, will they? Aristus May 12 #43

they can't help themselves Skittles May 12 #46

Too bad they bounced before you could kick their asses! Aristus May 12 #49

I do enjoy taunting some of them Skittles May 12 #52

It's referring to absentee fathers. Quiet Em May 12 #15

THIS. Exactly. n/t CousinIT May 12 #33

It still centers the male role or lack there of. LuvLoogie May 12 #79

Single mother, single father, single parent in my understanding has always been meant as the sole parent Quiet Em May 12 #12

I don't see it that way Skittles May 12 #27

My father - a Dad, Grandpa and Great-Grandpa - used to ask a "drop-dead question".... Bluejeans May 11 #3

divorced dads are only a "problem" if they don't help to support their child Skittles May 11 #5

I can't un-alert this post. silverweb May 12 #73

HEH Skittles May 12 #80

I'm glad for that! silverweb Wednesday #111

This is akin to saying "bastard child" Seinan Sensei May 11 #7

or "illegitimate" Skittles May 11 #9

Doesn't this assume the father had a choice? Renew Deal May 11 #8

In those cases, the single parent is referred to as a "widow" or "widower", not a "single mother" CousinIT May 12 #29

A "widow" doesn't describe a person with a child. Renew Deal May 12 #34

actually, no. 'single mother' is a broad and encompassing term stopdiggin Wednesday #101

Damn straight!!! calimary May 12 #14

Are you claiming that every time there is a single mother, it is because a man is to blame? Doodley May 12 #81

No. calimary May 12 #96

As of 2024-2025, there are approximately 3.3 million to 7.4 million families with a single father in the U.S. Doodley May 12 #97

As of 2024-2025, there are approximately 3.3 million to 7.4 million families with a single father in the U.S. Doodley May 12 #98

Good to know! calimary May 12 #99

Absolutely not. NH Ethylene May 12 #16

Exactly. The malevolent MAGA minded use B.See Thursday #112

Exactly. An achievement to be proud of. NH Ethylene Thursday #113

if the term 'single mother' is shallow, 'targeting' and singularly undescriptive ... stopdiggin May 12 #17

absentee was the key word. If a parent, a Mom or Dad is absentee Quiet Em May 12 #18

how about a person that is serving in the military stopdiggin May 12 #23

If both parents are active and not absentee in their children's lives Quiet Em May 12 #24

assumptions - accompanied by narrowing and restricted definition .... stopdiggin May 12 #25

But the OP headline and text of the meme are making no such distinctions AZJonnie May 12 #28

I am a single father BeneteauBum May 12 #19

Message auto-removed Name removed May 12 #50

I agree. BeneteauBum May 12 #56

Message auto-removed Name removed May 12 #58

Denying the alcoholism and losing custody was a big wake up call. BeneteauBum May 12 #63

And if the father died? And if the father isn't the one responsible for the breakup in the relationship? This looks Doodley May 12 #20

If the father died, she's called a "widow", not a single mother. But you know that. n/t CousinIT May 12 #30

Okay so my mother wasn't a single parent after all. Glad you put me straight. Doodley May 12 #36

She was widowed, she wasn't single obamanut2012 May 12 #40

My mother didn't want to go round telling people she was a widow. It isn't for you or Doodley May 12 #83

What if she wasn't married to him ? JI7 May 12 #55

The label police will decide what she should be called. Doodley May 12 #85

No, she is called both widow AND single mother. Its common lexicon for all the situations. FascismIsDeath May 12 #84

Thank you for saying that. This fixation on labels is absurd. Doodley May 12 #88

It isn't "man hating" -- just stop obamanut2012 May 12 #39

. Scrivener7 May 12 #78

Sometimes, single women are mothers by choice. Wouldn't they indeed be "single mothers?" littlemissmartypants May 12 #21

Yes, they are single mothers by choice Quiet Em May 12 #22

Exactly. Single mothers (even if it's a choice) are looked upon with derision. CousinIT May 12 #31

Good point PatSeg May 12 #47

Because somebody somewhere will be offended. Doodley May 12 #38

Who will be offended? obamanut2012 May 12 #41

Would you be offended? Doodley May 12 #89

Sometimes they're single because they're not married...like everybody else who's single...lol. Iggo Wednesday #106

Exactly. As opposed to... littlemissmartypants Wednesday #107

Wowzer. We live in an anti-woman, slut-and responsibility-shaming Abolishinist May 12 #26

We do... CousinIT May 12 #32

This kind of stuff is definitely a big reason that people get turned off from our side. FascismIsDeath May 12 #87

The outrage over labels is one reason we lose elections. Doodley May 12 #90

I do think people quinteroon May 12 #35

Agreed. And a man bringing up children on his own is also a single parent. Doodley May 12 #37

Woman, not female obamanut2012 May 12 #42

Excuse me? quinteroon May 12 #45

How ever hard we try, there's always somebody who will be offended. Doodley May 12 #91

Men who fear women frequently use the word "female" which is not so scary to them as "woman.". hunter May 12 #64

Message auto-removed Name removed May 12 #66

Is the word "male" on the banned list too? Doodley May 12 #93

you're correct (even if perhaps preaching to the wrong congregation) stopdiggin Wednesday #100

This thread did not disapoint... radicalleft May 12 #44

Message auto-removed Name removed May 12 #67

There is no 'single' One is either a mother or not. One is a father or not. BUT Republicans LOVE the Blame Game. dave99 May 12 #48

Hear, hear! ZDU May 12 #51

And yet "single mother" is accurate regardless of the reason they are raising a child or children alone. Jedi Guy May 12 #53

I'm glad to read your post Sparkly May 12 #59

Thank you for saying so. This is like a page out of 1984. Doodley May 12 #94

I think it's the insinuation of "shame" that needs to change ... Sparkly May 12 #54

I was a single teen mom, and I wouldn't have wanted my daughter's status to be linked to her very absentee (in our case) deurbano May 12 #75

How about Single Parent??????? NC popsdenver May 12 #57

Message auto-removed Name removed May 12 #60

Isn't the father also a single father??? Unrepentant Fenian May 12 #61

There is nothing wrong with the term. It is not seen as negative JI7 May 12 #62

Truly, I have never heard anyone shame single mothers. CozyMystery May 12 #65

Thank you, CousinIT, for standing up for women, and being willing to bring up challenges to the status quo. love_katz May 12 #68

Why does mom have a colostomy bag that she's wearing outside her Maru Kitteh May 12 #69

I was wondering what that was. Now I have to wonder why it's in the illustration... betsuni May 12 #76

I should've scrolled down Sympthsical Wednesday #103

Because the image is most likely AI slop. littlemissmartypants Wednesday #109

So I can't say "single mother" anymore or flvegan May 12 #70

"woman who made good post-child decision and rid her life of that male scum" Abolishinist May 12 #86

You illustrate the absurdity perfectly! And how are the children supposed to feel with those labels? Doodley May 12 #95

I never thought of the term as sexist, anti-woman, or slut before this thread. nt Gore1FL May 12 #71

I still don't think it is n/t Polybius May 12 #72

They are still "single mothers." They aren't married to the dad and they have children. valleyrogue May 12 #74

Right on! MLAA May 12 #77

There is not one microscopic drop of sexism, demonization or anything anti-woman about the term "single mother". FascismIsDeath May 12 #82

Thank you, very well said. Abolishinist May 12 #92

This feels like building a useless gate Sympthsical Wednesday #102

I have no doubt that at this very moment a cogent response Abolishinist Wednesday #110

Um, no. Mike Niendorff Wednesday #104

There's nothing wrong with "single mothers." Iggo Wednesday #105

Message auto-removed Name removed Wednesday #108

"Single Mother" Is Demonstrable. The Role Of the Sire Is Not So Obvious..... ColoringFool Saturday #114

I've always considered "single mothers" to be Rock Stars, never a term of derision krawhitham Saturday #115